Why
by RawR means i love u 007
Summary: Piper, Leo's best friend commits suicide and she leaves behind tapes of her story leading up to it. This is somewhat inspired by Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher but there is a bit of a difference. Sorry the summary kind of sucks but other than that enjoy :D If you don't like Leo/Piper don't read
1. Preface

LPOV:

"Crazy," I muttered to myself, "Just crazy, I had talked to her last night and she seemed perfectly fine." I said as I tossed my backpack onto my bed. There was some time there that I didn't realize that she was hurting worse than she had let on. I had gotten the call this morning from my mother that there was a package on the doorstep addressed to me. I had just told her to put it on my desk in my room.

While I was at school I had then received that message over the P.A. system that there was a student who had committed suicide this morning. I had been looking for her all morning and I had just figured that she had gotten sick. Then I had put it all together; Piper was the student who had committed suicide.

I walked across my room to the desk where the box sat; it was wrapped in a bright orange paper, there was a letter connected to the box in the same color envelope. There was no way this could be happening. There was no way Piper could be dead. It killed me to think that my best friend was dead and that there was no reasoning with it.

Piper wasn't just on some vacation, she wasn't coming back. I couldn't wrap my head around the fact that my best friend had just given up on life. There was a horrible pain in my chest that caused me to cry and realize that there were feelings I had for Piper that I couldn't explain.

I grabbed the envelope and carefully opened it, it was addressed to me in Piper's handwriting, her neat handwriting that was the envy of many girls in our grade.

_"Dear Leo,_

_ I can understand that you think that I'm possibly the stupidest person in the whole entire world at the moment. This was something that probably would have happened no matter what. I know it's hard to grasp that I am actually gone and that's the only reason you happen to be reading this note._

_ I have sent eight other people boxes and letters also, find them and make sure that they heard the story and read the letters. Please don't hate me; I want you to know that I apologize for any for of pain I may have caused you Leo. In the box there are a various assortment of things that were significant to your relationship to me. I want you, as you go along with the tapes, to scatter the objects all over town. Leo I also want you to know that you are the only one that has a copy of all the tapes. Out of anyone you deserve to know the whole truth. _

_ Piper"_

I looked at the note in my hand and sighed trying to keep myself from crying. There was a soft knock on my door and my mother poked her head in, "Mijo are you ok?"

"I'm perfectly fine ma, can I borrow the Mustang for the night?" I asked her.

"Sure, just as long as you promise me that there's nothing wrong and you would tell me if there was." She pleaded.

"There's nothing wrong with me ma, I just need the cassette player in the car." I explained.

"Why mijo?" my mom asked me.

"Because my teacher assigned me these stupid tapes that I need to listen to for extra credit." I felt bad lying to my mom but that was the only way I could get around the whole Piper's Suicide Story thing.

My mom looked at me and gave a me a half smile, "Ok but if you need anything promise that you'll tell me."

"I promise ma, just relax I'm not thinking about killing myself." I tried to joke with her.

She kissed the top of my head and left the room. I noticed the keys to the Mustang were sitting by me on the bed. I grabbed the box and the keys and went out to the car. This would be the start of a long night that I couldn't possibly take back. 


	2. Tape One

I slid the first cassette into the player and waited for a moment there was silence then a bit of fuzz. Finally Piper's voice came through it,

"_The reason you have these tapes is probably because I am dead. I know it sounds ridiculous and you don't know why the heck you have received tapes from the girl who had just killed herself._

_ Well you have a reason and I will let you know why on the second side of this tape. You will hear my story from the beginning…the story leading up to my decision. It's not that I blame you it's just that you were one of the reasons why."_

Well I was the only one who had all of the tapes there were about five in all. I sighed and removed the tape from the player and flipped it around so it was on the second side. I waited for the car to process the tape and then her voice filled the Mustang.

"_There are many things that I myself regret doing and I know there are tons of people I have hurt. This one is for you, Jason Grace. This is how you ended up on my reasons why. I am not going to say that there wasn't a reason for you being here because there was. There's a reason that all of the people who received a tape are on this list. Am I blaming you for my decision to do what I did? No, that's not at all what I happen to be saying. I'm just saying that you ended up impacting me in a way that most other people didn't."_

Piper was crazy; there was no need for her to decide to do what she did. Why didn't' she just tell me what she was going through? I was beginning to wonder if Piper really did blame us for this whole thing that happened. I've known Piper since we were little and she used to be bubbly and perky. As soon as we were freshmen in high school something about her changed.

I ran my hand through my now unruly hair due to the mid-May heat. I looked out at the park where there were some kids playing on the equipment. I know I probably looked like some form of rapist but that wasn't what I was aiming for here.

_"Well you came to Goode during our freshmen year and instantly there was a hoard of girls surrounding you asking you the uniform questions like where you were from , what your name was, and what was your first class. I must admit there was something about you that I seemed to like when I first saw you._

_ So you ended up being in my classes where you struggled a bit in Greek class. After about a week I finally got the courage to ask if you would like a tutor. You looked at me gratefully and accepted my offer. I made plans to meet with you after school at the park to help you study for that Monday's quiz._

_ When the time came I waited at the park for about four hours before thinking that you would never show. Finally as it was beginning to get pretty dark I was about to give up on the thought of you even meeting me there. I had figured that someone had gotten a hold of you and convinced you otherwise. Just as I was putting my homework that I had finished in the two hours back into my backpack you showed up with an apologetic smile on your face._

_ "Sorry I was talking to my mom about something and I had to sneak out." You explain._

_ "Well it's too dark to do anything here so why don't we just head over to the pizza parlor and grab a bite to eat while we study." I suggested._

_ While we were at the pizza parlor we had gotten to know one another a little better and well there hadn't been a whole lot of studying going on. So as we were leaving you asked if you could give me a lift on your bike since I had walked to the park. I agreed and you walked me up to the door. And with that we said goodnight and that was it there was no form of a kiss, no form of physical contact, or any form of the evening you had portrayed to the boys at school the next day."_

I remembered the hell Piper had gone through freshmen year and all the times I had been there for her when she needed me. I knew who the cause was, the new guy who had known Piper for a week and ruined her reputation in a matter of five minutes.

_"When I had gotten to school the next day there were whispers and snickers as I walked down the hall to my locker. I tried my best to block them out and finally it had gotten to me by lunch a month later when a senior decided that it would be cute to try to smack my butt. I found you talking to the group of jocks that were no good whatsoever._

_ They began to give me catcalls and whistles when I asked if I could speak to you over by the walls. You told them to back off and followed me to talk. You denied telling them that we had done anything and well let's just say I still never exactly knew what you told them exactly."_

Piper wasn't the kind of girl to let a little gossip get to her but this had gone on way too long and honesty it had gotten out of hand. She had ended up avoiding Jason for the next few months and then finally she let him back into her life because he was struggling in Greek. I had told her she was crazy for doing this but Piper had believed he had changed and decided to help him out again.

_"Then on a Monday a few months later you had decided that you would ask me for help because you were failing in Greek. I of course agreed, trusting that you would keep out lessons on the down low. Had agreed once again to meet you in the park after school and since it was a Friday you promised that you would bring a pizza to snack on. _

_ At the park I ignored the fact that you were already an hour late and that you had promised me that you would be there on time. Finally you showed up an hour and a half late but you weren't alone. You had brought one of your friends with you after you had promised me that you would keep this quiet._

_ After about an hour of studying I told you that I had to get home before my dad freaked out. You offered me a ride home but I was smarter this time. I told you I was ok and that I would most likely just get a cab to take me home. But as I tried to leave you decided to follow me home after saying goodbye to your friend. You asked me out once we reached my house and for some reason I agreed to one date with you._

_ This is where your part of the story ends Jason; I know you know what follows after this. I honestly just hope that you decided to keep yourself on the right path and clean yourself up when it comes to your track record with the girls. Jason you seem like a great guy you just put me through hell for three years of this and I hope you never do this to another girl as long as you live."_

I started my car a decided to leave before I began to look sketchy and got the cops called on myself. I decided that I would go to the café that Piper and I used to go to after school to discuss the things that were going in our lives. It was a quaint little café with moderate prices. I ordered an espresso and waited until the waitress on call brought me my order.

Finally she walked over to me and smiled, I recognized her from school; I think she was a senior. Her hair was black and just grazed the top of her shoulders and she had blue eyes. There was a slight aqua tint to her hair. She handed me the espresso cup and looked at me.

"Leo Valdez right?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'm sorry your name slipped my mind." I said before looking up at her.

"Umm I don't know if this sounds familiar but I'm Thalia Grace we had Spanish together." She explained.

"Oh Jason's sister right?" I asked.

She smiled, "Yeah that's me. Hey are you ok? You look like my brother, he's been ghosting around the house lately." She said her eyebrows were scrunched together in what seemed like genuine worry.

"I'm fine but it was nice to talk to you." I said before deciding that I would take this to go, "Can I get this in a to-go cup?"

"Um yeah I'll be right back." She said before going to go put the coffee into the cup.

The café was managed by a local college student and well it was one of the most affordable places to get coffee and things. He was a nice guy and I think he was dating Thalia because the last time I had been here with Piper they were holding hands over the counter. Usually the café was really busy but tonight the usual crowd wasn't there.

The hipsters from the college and the high school, the occasional soccer mom, and the interns, assistants, and business people who work late weren't creating the usual lines that folded out the door and around the corner for the coffee the café offered. Thalia returned from the back of the café and handed me the to-go cup that felt warm and inviting.

"Well have a nice night, and stay out of trouble. You seem like a good kid." She said as I was walking out the door.

"Thanks and I'll try!" I called as I walked out of the café.

For the first time in the three years I had been going to the café I finally took the time to look at the name of the café that was painted on the blue and white stripped banner. The name was "Olympus Coffee House and Café", something was special about this place and I had known it from the moment Piper and I had stumbled upon it. This was the coffee house that had replaced the diner where Piper and I had met in the seventh grade. I was just now after three years of coming to this café realized that this was where Piper and I had originally met.

It's strange that you begin to realize that the person who just committed suicide had more to her than she led on. I wondered if Piper had known that this was where we had met or had it just been a coincidence? But it's odd that now I was noticing thing for the first time when they tied to her. 


	3. Tape Two Side A

I walked back to my Mustang and grabbed my mom's Sony Walkman that I know is stashed in the glove compartment. I decided that I was going to listen to another tape. Even if I still had no clue why I was put onto Piper's List of Reasons Why. I decided to walk in the park that was close to the café.

_"This is where Jason doesn't fully make an exit but where another person comes into the story. This is where you step in Reyna honey. At first when I had met you over the summer you were shy and kind, but that changed the minute I had started to see Jason."_

I remembered when Piper dated Jason for about four months. Jason had been cheating on her the whole time with multiple girls. Everyone knows who they were but Jason denies even cheating on her. He never could stand to face the truth when the blame was put onto him.

_"You had found out I was dating Jason and you decided to spread a nasty rumor about me. Do you remember the rumor Reyna? Well I definitely do. It ruined my reputation even more than the rumors from freshman year prior to this. This was where my life began to really spiral out of control. The thing was you were jealous that I was dating Jason, a girl he had just met not even a year before. While you had known him for ages and nothing. Am I correct or am I just assuming?_

_ So anyway when I had started to date Jason you sent around a wildfire rumor about me. It didn't take very long until I found out about it. We were at the same party and Jason was off somewhere. I noticed that you were looking at me so I smiled and waved to you. Hoping that maybe you would walk over and we could talk for a moment. _

_ You just ignored me and I was confused. We had usually talked and usually I had enjoyed talking to you. Then the senior walked over to me. As I tried to push past him he wouldn't let me go. I noticed you were watching with a slightly smug look. He pushed me farther against the wall and leaned so close to me that I could smell the alcohol on his breath. _

_ "So how much for a night baby?" he slurred._

_I noticed that you now looked away, "Where in the world did you hear that?"_

_ "From some girl over there." He slurred._

_Finally I had pushed past him and I ran out of the party and began to walk home. When I got home there were tons of texts on my phone asking me about my prices. This was ridiculous I hadn't even done what they were asking for with the guy I was dating or any guy ever. I sat on my bed with my head in my hands and I cried._

_ This was surely a rumor started to ruin my life. I was now in the process of who could have started this rumor. This horrible rumor. And I would never have known until school that Monday after the party. You were leaning against your locker talking to my boyfriend. Jason looked over at me and you smirked. _

_ I waved and then some guy walked over and loudly proclaimed that he had a good night with me and he would like to do it again because his parents were out of town this weekend. "_

I remembered that rumor. Someone had told a bunch of the guys that Piper was a slut or something. This had spread like wildfire and she was going through a pretty touch time for awhile there. If I remembered she had been put onto depression medication for this whole incident.

_ Later that day I tracked the boy down and asked him who had told him to say that. Reyna do you remember who paid him to say that in front of my boyfriend? I do and I am 100% positive that you do to. He looked at me like he was terrified and finally after ten minutes of avoiding the subject he finally cracked. He told me you had paid him to say that. _

_ This hurt because I had considered you a friend and I thought you were a pretty cool person. You returned the favor by spreading a nasty rumor about me and well I really wish you had talked to me about this. It would have been wonderful if you would have said something to me. I would have loved to have another friend._

_ Reyna honey your story isn't over yet you were there for a long while making my life miserable all because I didn't know you liked Jason. You were one of the people who have a reserved spot on this list. Some of the people on this list are just receiving an apology, not that they were exactly a reason. You were one of them though and I wish it could have been the opposite."_

The thought that Piper wanted to apologize to Reyna was shocking. Why would she want to do that after this rumor she had started practically ruined Piper's life? I know I would have been out for vengeance. Then again Piper was one of those people who always forgave and forgot. I wondered how she did it when half the people she forgave had tried to ruin her life.

_ I'm not going to continue the tape with your story because I don't want to do that to you. I just wanted you to get a taste of what I went through. Reyna I really wished we could have been friends because you're a wonderful person and I know everyone gets jealous. But instead of spreading rumors you could have communicated the facts to me directly with a talk._

_ I'm not wishing you any bad will because Reyna I'm not like that. I want you to live your life to the fullest but I want you to try to handle your jealousy differently. I know what I'm like when I get jealous but just find another way."_

I continued to walk through the park and sat under the tree Piper and I usually did. It faced the pond and I watched the swans swim around in the water occasionally dunking themselves under the water for the usual snack. Piper had always loved to watch the swans and ducks when we were at the pond. I heard once that when a swan's mate dies the other dies of a broken heart. Was that how I was going to end up? I looked over at the tree and in the trunk where I had carved our initials into the tree with a pocket knife.

There was a slight breeze and well it was nice. I remembered holding Piper until she stopped crying under this tree one night because of that certain rumor. That was the night I had carved our initials into the tree. Hopefully I wouldn't end up like the other swan but who knows I just might. I wish there was a way that I could have prevented this from happening to Piper I wish I could have gone back to that night and fixed Piper's feelings. Why and I blaming myself? How could this have been my fault anyway?


	4. Tape Two Side B

I flipped the tape over to start the next story and well I was starting to wonder where I was going to be on this list. This was beginning to puzzle me and I was beginning to realize that I would probably be one of the last on this list.

_This next story is for you Frank, you were the quiet guy and this has nothing to do with your fault. I want to apologize to you for something I did. I'm sorry that I watched those guys bully you and I did nothing about it. I had just simply allowed it to go on and I pretended like I had seen nothing. I was selfishly thinking about my own problems when yours were far worse than my own. _

_ I remember the day like it was yesterday, we were sophomores and it was after school. You were being picked on because of your race and that was something I had a lot of experience with. You were walking out to your car after football practice. The jocks walked over to you and began to push you around. _

_ They called you horrible names, demeaning names, things I wondered how you put up with them. I had been noticing the change on your behavior for a few weeks. Honestly I wanted nothing but to walk over to you and ask if you were ok. But being the person I was I never did get the chance to ask if you were ok. Frank this is where I want to owe you an apology. _

Frank was a pretty cool guy, I had never been close to him exactly but I had gotten to know him from football and a few classes over the years. I know he had gone through some heck with the guys but I didn't know what Piper was talking about.

_The next week I was back in the parking lot, sitting in my car just crying. Then I noticed that you were walking to your car. I know I probably seem like a stalker but I was concerned for you. Just as you were throwing your gym bag into the trunk of your car they came over to you once again._

_ They were pushing you around again; I could hear them calling you the same names as they had for weeks. Then they pushed you onto the ground and began to beat you and kick you. I watched in horror as they stood in a group and kicked you to the point of near unconsciousness. Finally our World History teacher came along and they ran off. I watched her as she helped you up and made sure you were taken to the hospital._

I remembered that he was out for the rest of the week. I had visited Frank at the hospital when I had found out that he had been hurt. That explained why a lot of our best players had been suspended from playing and school for three weeks. It was early though and the thing was his mom and grandmother hadn't wanted the real reason out. They had told all the students that Frank had an accident.

_ Frank this was horrible and it had weighed on my conscience for a long time and I feel horrible that I did nothing about it. If I could go back in time I would most definitely have stopped it and not have let it get as far as it had. _

_ This isn't the end though. At a party, one everyone was attending, they were at it again. They had pulled you out to the alley where they thought no one would see them. They were wrong; I saw them. They did terrible things to you. I cried as I watched them beat you to the point where you were black and blue and barely conscience. They left you there, you were bleeding from the nose and the mouth, you had two black eyes, you clothes were ripped from the way they handled you, and you were shivering._

_ I don't know if you remembered this but Hazel suddenly rushed into the alley. Hazel was your best friend at the time and eventually that night she became your girlfriend. Do you want to know how Hazel knew to check the alley Frank? _

_ After the jocks left, I had texted Hazel to rush out to alley, she most likely hadn't recognized my number because in the day following she had never said anything to me about it. After Hazel had taken you to the hospital I sat there and I cried. I felt horrible for just sitting there and watching them beat you into another near death experience when I could have put a stop to the whole thing multiple times. I cried because I knew the pain you were feeling, being bullied because of your race, your family heritage, your ethnicity. I cried because I was angry with myself for being so hopeless when it came to confronting bullies. _

_ Frank you are an amazing person and I don't want you to end up in the same boat I ended up in. Surround yourself with friends and never let the bullies bring you down. I know the saying 'sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me' I ridiculous but don't let them get to you. Whoever came up with that saying must never had known what it was like to be bullied or maybe they were possibly the bullies themselves. My best advice is stick with Hazel I know she cares a great deal with you._

There were a few rumors about why Frank was back in the hospital later that month. He had ended up with broken bones, a concussion, and some other things. Once again most of the football team had visited him as did most of the class. Then there were the few jocks that hadn't been to the hospital to visit you. They were the same jocks who were suspended before. Piper didn't visit either I remembered asking if she wanted to but she told me she had already sent you flowers or something.

_ Frank everyone is beautiful, no matter how far you have to look to find the beauty. You're one of the lucky people who allow your beauty to show through no matter what. I truly regret not sticking up for you when I witnessed those wicked acts of racism. I wish there was more that I had done. I did nothing. So for all of that Frank I am truly sorry. I am so sorry for my selfishness and my cowardice. I was so worried about myself that I had never gotten pas itt to help a person who truly needed the help._

I looked at my shoes and shook my head. I never knew that Frank had gone through all of that. I decided to walk back to my car and I made a vow that if I had ever witnessed bullying I was going to make sure it stopped then and there. I wish I had known about all of that I would have been a little easier on Frank when he made a mistake at practice. I noticed that Frank was a little more outgoing since those guys graduated that year and he started to date Hazel but God, I didn't know about the reason he was in the hospital.

I was still processing that Piper had that on her mind for so long and she had never once told me that happened or that she had witnessed it both times. There was a giggle beside me and I looked over to see Marleigh, the Australian transfer. She came last year and we were lab partners in Bio. She was pretty cool the few times I had talked to her. I took the headphones off and put them around my neck.

"Whatcha' listening to mate, anything good?" she asked.

How was I going to explain to her that I was listening to a dead girl? I didn't answer for a moment and thought about what I was going to say. Finally I thought of something.

"Nothing, just some History notes for the test on Monday." I lied.

"We have a test Monday?" she asked me. Crap I forgot that Marleigh was in my History class.

"Um that's what I heard from someone maybe they had it wrong." I shrugged.

"Are you ok Leo?" she asked giving me a look that read nothing but pure concern. It was the same look that my mother had given me.

"Yeah I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?" I tried for a fake laugh but I sounded like an old smoker.

"Well I guess I'll see you around then mate." She smiled at me but I could still tell that she was worried about me.

"Yeah, I'll see you around Marleigh." I smiled back but I didn't know how convincing it looked.

As she walked away I saw her look over her shoulder at me before continuing on her way again.

Piper was always worrying about me like that. Honestly I should have been the one that worried about her. Now I guess I looked suicidal to a lot of people today because that was the millionth person to ask me that question. I guess I would look that way considering that my best friend had just killed herself. She didn't even give a warning sign. I had literally talked to her hours before this happened.

I finally made my way back to my Mustang and I ran my hand through my hair. I let out an exasperated sigh and put the key into the ignition and I didn't know where to go but I decided to drive. I drove wherever my auto piloted mind had decided to take me. 


	5. Tape Three Side A

**I'm sorry for not updating for like two weeks but I've been super busy lately...expect another chapter hopefully today but I'm not quite sure due to the fact that it's Cinco de Mayo and well I'm forcing my family to celebrate their heritage. Thanks to all the reviewers...continue to read. Enjoy and review :D**

I parked my car in the middle of the beach parking lot. This was Piper's favorite place in the world. She was always at the beach and I always knew I could find her here when she wouldn't answer her phone. There was a thing about the beach that comforted me. It wasn't as comforting as the feeling I get from sitting around a bonfire at the summer camp that I council for.

There was a couple walking along the beach. I could just barely make out the faces. It wasn't anyone I knew so I sat in my car and I popped in the next tape. Piper's voice filled the car instantly. I guess by the time she made this tape she had gotten the hang of this.

_Hazel Levesque this is your tape. I am apologizing for something that I'm almost positive you don't know that I'm fully aware of. It was the last day of school so everyone decided to go down to the beach. I went with a friend of mine and everyone was having a good time. Why shouldn't they have? It was a gorgeous early June day and the water was decent temperature. _

_ That night everyone decided to have a bonfire. That's where the alcohol kicked in and things were beginning to get out of hand. There were jocks and cheerleaders making out, the girls were totally smashed because they weren't very good at holding their alcohol, and the boys had pretty much been smashed since the late afternoon. The bonfire was constructed from driftwood and it smelled of salt. The flames weren't the normal color due to the briny wood that was being burnt. I was enjoying the fire until I heard crying from the woods. No one really noticed because of the loud music that was playing._

I remembered that party and I was having a good time. Halfway through the bonfire Piper had left so I left after saying goodbye to Frank and few other friends. I didn't even know Piper had witnessed this at all. It must have been tough.

_ I made my ways to the cries and I decided that I should go see what was going on. I wasn't at the party because I had wanted to be but I had gone because my friend had begged me to go with him to have a little fun. I found you in the woods crying. There was someone standing over you. I hid behind a tree and watched as you were making out. I wondered where Frank was and he was no where to be seen._

_ I could barely make out the person standing above you and then I recognized him. The one who started all of this crap... after about three or four minutes of trying to make out Jason left you there. Later he came back with a friend. One who didn't look too friendly. _

_I watched him assault you and well I never said anything. I'm sorry Hazel, I just sat there and I watched. I knew what it was like to be harassed but never on this level. I sat behind that tree and I cried for you. The guy never found me and I tried to make sure you were alright, but you were passed out. Then I left you there. I ran straight to the bonfire and I didn't look back. That's where I end your story Hazel but that's not the last thing I have to say to you._

Wow I never knew that had happened. Piper witnessed one of the quietest, sweetest girls and school get raped and never told anyone about it. That party was pretty fun but now that I know what really happened I don't think I'll be going back to one for awhile. I can't believe that happened to Hazel, she probably doesn't exactly know what happened herself.

There was the fact that this really didn't all match up and I wondered where the heck I would be popping up on this list once again. Piper can I just get through this? Why does this have to be so drug out?

_ Hazel don't dwell on this too long and try to move on. You have someone who really does genuinely love you. Grab hold and don't let go. He knows what it's like to go through something similar. You're amazing inside and out and you were an amazing friend. You're one of the people who made an impact on me and made me think about why I was dwelling on things. _

_ There are a few things in my life that compare to what you went through. So between the two of us I look like a wuss. You went through a lot that night and I never said anything. I am deeply and truly sorry for letting you go through that and not saying a thing about it. I know this was like the millionth time I had said this during this tape but I can't say it enough to justify my actions. _

The tape stopped and I was sitting in my car when I saw Jason. He was sitting on the beach down by the water. His head was in his hands and well I think it was something to do with his tape. I mean he did deserve it. I took the keys out of the ignition and went to go see if he was ok.

I approached him and decided to go for a casual greeting, "Hey Jason what's up?"

"Nothing, I just can't believe that she did it." Jason muttered, "You were friends with her weren't you?"

"Yeah we were best friends." I said as I took a seat next to him.

"Did she let you know anything before she did this?" he asked.

"No she just did this." I admitted, "I had literally talked to her just before she did this."

"Do you know how she killed herself?" he asked. His eyes were red-rimmed and it was pretty obvious that he had been crying.

"No I have no idea how she killed herself." I admitted.

"Well I know it's probably too late to tell her I was sorry but I think I need to say it." Jason said, "Do you know when her funeral is?"

"No, I don't but I'm pretty sure that it'll be released later or something." I said.

"Are you going to go?" he asked me.

"Of course, she was my beast friend." I said.

"Do you think you could go with me?" he asked.

"Yeah sure, you really feel bad about something don't you?" I asked him.

"Leo I was the main reason, I was the person who started the whole chain of events." He whispered.

"What do you mean?" I asked him.

"I ruined her reputation first." He looked at me.

"Do you really think that way, Jason there are tons of different reasons that someone would do something like this." I tried to sound assuring.

I wasn't going to let it out that I had a copy of the tapes. For some weird reason I had a feeling that I wasn't the only one with a complete set of the tapes. For some reason I felt that someone else has them too. But I don't know who this is.

"Leo I wish I could go back to when I met and change everything so maybe she wouldn't have done this." He said.

"Jason you can't solely blame yourself. Everyone who actually does this has other reasons." I was still trying to be assuring.

"Well I should probably get going man. I'll um talk to you later." He said before getting up.

I followed suit, "Hey if you ever need to talk to someone, you can always talk to me man."

He smiled slightly, "Thanks man, I think I might."

With that we went our separate ways. I started my car and wait before turning the tape over. I wondered who the next story would go to. This was beginning to make no sense. I didn't see where I ended up on this list. Did I hurt you in anyway Piper? Did I do something to you at all to make you commit suicide and consider me a reason?


	6. Tape Three Side B

**Sorry about not updating for so long. I've had a serious case of writer's block lately. I'll try to get another chapter out later today but again there's no promises. Enjoy and review :D Love ya guys! **

The tape started and Pipe was talking again. I was really beginning to allow the fact that she was gone sink into my mind. There was an odd sniffling sound at the beginning of the tape, here we go, this one was mine.

_This is your tape Octavian. _

Well I was wrong, I wish she would just get to the point and let me know where the hell I fit into all of this. I sighed and continued to listen to the tape and her story. Her reasons for Octavian being on this list. Everyone knew Octavian was a well known pervert and well things always got awkward with him around.

_You were the one who raped a girl at that beach party. I won't say any names incase this tape gets leaked. But you know who I'm talking about. You were also the one whom a certain person paid to make me sound like something I wasn't. Octavian you are on this list of reasons for a very specific one._

_ Octavian you really need to consider some form of counseling. I know that sounds a little harsh but hey the truth can hurt. I really do feel sorry for you though. You were just someone who needed a friend and well I never really once extended a hand to you. _

_ You're probably wondering when I'll get to the point and why you received this tape. Well Octavian I think we both know that answer even though you never really admitted it. This isn't something that you would want to admit in the first place. Octavian I know your secret and I promise I won't let this get out to anyone but two more people._

Wait two? Piper gave another copy of the tapes to someone else. That's interesting I wonder who that could be.

_It was a normal night and I was home alone. My blinds were drawn over my window but no completely closed. Something felt really weird that night but I shrugged it off and continued to change out of my rain drenched clothes. Then I heard it the slightest movement in the tree outside my window. The smallest rustle of the limb on the window pane and while I was still half undressed I looked to see what it was._

_ Now Octavian can you tell me what it was or do I have to refresh your memory? _

_ There was the sound of a camera and that's when I noticed you sitting there in the tree. You were a peeping Tom, how many times before this had you been there outside my window? How many times had you obtained pictures of me while I was changing?_

I remembered Piper complaining to me that she felt like someone was watching her. I remembered that she called me over one night to make sure no one was in the window. I remembered the pictures that leaked around the whole school shortly after that. Pictures that practically sent Piper over the edge.

_You fell out of the tree halfway down it and ran away, I watched you hop onto your bike and I remembered crying after that had happened. The next night I called a friend of mine over to check and see if there was anyone out there. Believe me if he had caught you that night I would have had to stop him from tearing you apart._

I would have torn him apart too if Piper would have told me who it was. I remembered talking to Octavian the next day. He acted really strange but I thought nothing of it. I figured it was just some pedo or something. I had never expected that he had gone to our school.

_ He continued coming over for about a week and then when we finally decided that you wouldn't come around again he stopped coming over. That's when you started it up again. You sent those pictures around the whole school and they finally got to me. I was used to people thinking what they wanted of me but now it was beginning to get out of hand._

Those pictures practically made it to every teenager in town. I think it even made their way down to the middle schoolers. After those pictures surfaced Piper wouldn't come to school for a month and I didn't blame her. Her dad hired a tutor and I took her homework to her after school. So many catty things were said about her. They called her a slut and a skank. Things that didn't describe Piper at all. Things that didn't even belong in the same sentence as her name.

Finally when Piper had come back to school there was no evidence of the pictures because the principal had cracked down on this. Piper was a wreck and well I think things all began to go farther downhill from where they already were. I'm pretty sure these pictures were what caused her to crack and fully break.

_Octavian I hope you now know how it feels to have your whole world come crashing down around you. Why did you take those pictures? Why did you have to send them around the school? Is there anything that I actually did to you to deserve this? Octavian you need to use your picture taking talent for good not evil._

_ I know you were paid by someone for those pictures and I know it was the same person who had paid you before to ruin my reputation slightly. Did you ever once consider that surfacing those pictures was a little bit extreme? Did you ever consider what you would have done if those were pictures of you?_

_ Honestly I don't think you did. I think you just wanted to impress the girl who has completely ignored your existence. I will say you need to find another way to express your picture taking talent. Don't do this to another person who didn't deserve it. Well actually no one deserves having half nude pictures of themselves leaked around the whole school. Octavian I feel sorry for you because you think this is the way to impress someone. _

I took the tape out and got out of the car and decided to get some fresh air. Then I noticed Marleigh walking my way. She smiled at me and I smiled back; I didn't know how convincing it looked. I don't think I worked by the look on Marleigh's face.

"Are you ok Leo?" she asked me.

"I'm fine why?" I asked her.

"You look like you've been through hell and back." Marleigh replied.

"I'm just kind of torn up about Piper. She was my best friend." I admitted.

I hadn't known Marleigh very long and we were from two completely different continents but I felt like I've known her my whole life. Despite her being the Australian exchange student, and I was just the boy from New York, it was so easy to talk about anything with her.

"It's understandable, you were close and her suicide was sudden." Marleigh smiled sympathetically.

"She gave you the other copy of the tapes didn't she?" I asked Marleigh.

Marleigh nodded, "Piper did give me the other copy, she gave them to me to make sure that everyone had heard them. Which tape are you at?"

"I just finished Octavian's tape."

Marleigh looked at me, "Come on, I'll drive and you listen to the tapes. Can I see your keys?"

I handed Marleigh the keys and we headed back to my car. Where I popped in another tape.


	7. Tape Four Sides A & B

**I updated! Yay, i should like get a prize for the worse updater ever! Anywho, enjoy the chapter and I'll try to post the next very, very soon. The next chapter is what you have all been waiting for, and yes I'm making you wait one more wretched chapter. Muahahaha! Enjoy and reveiw :D love ya guys!**

Marleigh started the car and put in the next tape, "Leo I just want you to listen to these next tapes."

"Why?" I asked her.

"Just do it." She smiled.

_Drew you're next hon, you're the next on the list. You've put me through years of torture but once we hit high school everything got worse. I'm not talking about all your catty remarks; I'm talking about the last party we went to. The last party we were at together. The party where you completely humiliated me. _

_ It was a normal high school party, complete with the normal cigarette smoke, alcohol, and pot. The drunken jocks and cheerleaders, the potheads had their own little corner of the party, and then there were the normal people who could hold their alcohol and ignore the attempts from the potheads to buy some pot. That's where I happened to be that night. I had recently been talking with a close friend who left because he had to work the next morning. _

_ You walked over to me Drew and acted all nice like we were best friends or something. You put your arm around my shoulder and drug me out to the backyard where there were a few jocks who were definitely drunken trying to jump into the pool from the roof._

_ You guided me over to a jock that I barely recognized and introduced us._

_ "Piper I'd like you to meet Jake Mason, he's a close friend of mine." You said to me._

_ I hung out with Jake for awhile he was pretty nice but then he had to go and asked me if I wanted a ride. I told him I already had one and thanked him for the offer and he kissed me on the cheek and left. Then that's when you walked back over to me. This time you were with another guy who looked like trouble and you introduced us. You told me his name was Ethan and he gave me the creeps._

_ "Well I'll leave you two to get to know each other." You smiled before going to get another drink._

_ That's when Ethan looked at me, "So when do you want to start?"_

_I looked at him, "I'm sorry what?"_

_ "Drew told me that you'll do anything for the right price." He said like it was obvious._

_ I looked over at you and you wiggled your fingers at me like you were oblivious to the situation. Ethan looked at me, "Well are you going to give me your prices?"_

_ "Look I'm not like that, I think you're mistaking me for another girl." I said._

_ "I'm sorry." He said but he didn't sound too sorry. _

_He walked away from me and I went straight up to you and you smiled at me like you had no idea what was going on._

_ That night I had six or seven different guys after that come over and ask me about prices. You told the whole football, baseball, soccer, swim, basketball, track, cross, and tennis team that I was a slut who would do anything for the right price._

_ That was last week Drew that was the party that made me wonder why I was put onto this Earth. It made me wonder if my whole life had been a joke. That night I had actually considered committing suicide but someone talked me out of it._

_ Drew you really need to be nicer to people and I'm sorry if I ever did anything to make you hate me. I think we could have been friends if we tried. I'm sorry that we never got along but I think we went about it the wrong way. We never really tried to be friends, we, and I'll admit to it, continued to hate one another over something stupid. So there, I said it, I'm sorry Drew._

Piper was considering doing this before? She actually considered this last week? I looked at Marleigh who looked at me sadly.

"You were the one who talked her out of it weren't you?" I asked her.

"Yeah she called me that night crying she was hysterical. I talked her out of swallowing a bottle of pills."

I looked at Marleigh in shock, "Why didn't she call me?"

"She didn't want to bother you because you had to work; she said you have already done enough for her." Marleigh smiled sympathetically.

Marleigh flipped the tape over and the next story started.

_Lacy, you were a sweet girl and I considered you a friend. But you were only a friend as long as Drew wasn't around. You didn't want to lose your spot on the cheer squad. I watched as you were ridiculed by Drew every evening at cheer practice._

_ I know that over time you became bulimic because Drew said you were too big to be a flyer until you lost weight. Lacy you were smaller than her. I'm sorry that I never said anything or tried to stand up to you. You were someone I would have enjoyed becoming better friends with._

_ I know this isn't much of a story but I just wanted to apologize to you for not being the friend I should have been before._

Marleigh pulled out the tape and put the next one in, "Leo just sit there and listen don't talk until you've heard both sides of the tape."

Here we go, here's my story this should be interesting.


	8. Tape Five

_Leo this one's for you. I know I've hurt you the most out of anyone on this list. You were the one who was always there for me and how do I repay you? Well I go and kill myself. I won't forget that one night you and I actually got somewhere in our confusing relationship. The night that you told me something that I was a little afraid of. Honestly Leo I want to tell you one thing._

_ I remember the summer we both got a job working at the diner, not the one where we first met but the one on Main Street. The diner where all the hipsters and young couples went for a milkshake or where the elderly people would go for the nostalgic memories. We had really become close that summer, we had been friendly before but we got closer the summer of our freshmen year. _

_ Leo there was nothing like the friendship that we had forged that summer. We were inseparable and it was the closest I felt to normal since I was little and I was at home with my father all the time. Leo you were the one who kept me from doing this a long time ago. _

Here we go; I'm going to end up like the heartbroken swans at the park. There's no chance of falling into a mutual awkwardness with another girl. There was going to be no chance for me because I was in love with my best friend who committed suicide. Marleigh looked over at me but I could tell she was trying to keep her eyes on the road.

_ That night when we were at the beach together was the most normal night I have had for God knows how long. You were so sweet. I loved how your hand was so warm against mine; your jacket was draped over my shoulders. Then you kissed me and I panicked. Not that I didn't want you to kiss me that night because I'm pretty sure I had been hinting at that the whole night._

_ You pulled away and smiled at me shyly, "Piper can I tell you something?"_

_ I bit my lip in that way a girl would after a cute guy would kiss her, "Sure."_

_ "Piper I love you." You whispered softly._

_Then I ran, I ran away from you and I didn't talk to you until the night before I did this._

I felt something start to burn my eyes, oh great I was crying and Piper was getting into the really emotional stuff. I bit the inside of my lip and continued to listen to Piper's story.

_Leo that night when you told me you loved me I didn't know what to think. I freaked out a bit and well in the weeks following I never really got to tell you that I had the same feelings for you. Leo I want you to know that when I swallowed that handful of pills that I thought of how bad I would hurt you. Then I thought of how much better you could do with another girl. Someone who doesn't constantly hurt you and brought you down._

This is where Piper was starting to cry. This is not exactly the easiest thing to do I guess. I wouldn't do this personally. Marleigh was pulling into the park. She was really quiet the whole ride and well I don't think I could thank her more. If was driving I think I would've gotten into an accident.

_ Leo there's something important that I want you to take out of this tape. I want you to remember that no matter how much you think you love me, there's someone out there for you who will love you more than I ever could. _

Piper what were you thinking? Marleigh looked over at me and tried for a sympathetic smile but looked away almost instantly. There was something comforting about Marleigh there while I was listening to Piper telling me why she was committing suicide and why I was on her list.

_ As I swallowed those pills with the intent to end my life I also had the intent to stop you from hurting. It was obvious that you were hurting and that I was the one who was causing that hurt. You need to move on and find another girl and continue on with your life. I know that you will always remember me but don't dwell on what could have been. Don't be that swan that dies of a broken heart after its love dies, be the swan that moves on and finds another better love._

_ Leo I'm going to say it because I never got to say it before, I love you and there's nothing that will change that not even death. I honestly hope that you find another love and move on with your life. This is me saying goodbye because I didn't get say it in person. Goodbye Leo._

The tape went static and Marleigh looked over at me, "Are you ok?"

"I think so." I whispered.

"Leo it'll get better, it just takes some time." She whispered.

I looked into Marleigh's big green eyes and couldn't help but smile at her. I think Piper was right, maybe I would move on. Maybe it'll take some time but I think I'll move on in time. As long as I have Marleigh beside me I think everything will become easier.

"Marleigh I think I can move on." I whispered with a slight smile.

"And how's that?" she asked me.

"I think if you're there with me then I think that I'll make it." I whispered.

God that was pretty bold. I've only known Marleigh for awhile but I feel like she's known me my whole life. There was no way I was going to end up like the heart broken depressed swan. There was a chance for me to move on and fall in love with another girl.


	9. Ending but a New Beginning

We were sitting at Piper's funeral, everyone was wearing black. Jason was sitting there with Reyna who looked like she had a bad night. Frank and Hazel were there, Octavian even had the audacity to show up. Drew was there in the back and Lacy was too. It was interesting that they all showed, well Jason not so much. I know he felt guilty about it.

At the cemetery I watched as they lowered Piper's casket into the ground and Marleigh squeezed my hand. Over the past few days she's been really amazing. She's been there for me and tries to make me smile. It works and I know this is what Piper would have wanted.

After all the funeral processions were done Marleigh and I headed back to my Mustang. We had one more thing to do. We pulled into the park and went to the spot that Piper and I loved by the tree. I pulled out the box that contained the items Piper had given me that would remind me of our relationship. The box contained an old menu from the diner we worked at, a ticket for the movie we saw the night I kissed her, and a few other things. She was buried with the bracelet she had made for us as a sign of our friendship and I still wore mine.

I stuck them in the hole in the tree where no one ever looked and looked over at Marleigh who smiled. I held out my hand and she took it before we headed off to the car.


End file.
